Sunday, December 21, 2014

regression

if my posts seem to be rife with angsty self-absorbed melodrama, it's because i've fallen back into severe depression.  through all sorts of effort, luck, and opportunity, i'd thought i'd finally made progress, back in minneapolis.  i overestimated how solid my progress had been, and thought little of throwing it all away, to make the leap for the shaky branch that was chicago.

so, yeah, turns out that was a huge mistake, as it fell apart and left me with nothing, and nowhere to go.  i have no idea how or where to even begin to regain a semblance of independence, as effort was only ever part of the larger equation.  i don't know how to do anything but sit around waiting for an opportunity worth taking.  this seemed like a more reasonable plan, when i had a reliable place to stay, and my whole life ahead of me, but after everything i've gone through, to end up falling back to square one,. i'm not doing so well.

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