Saturday, December 6, 2014

do i feel manly?

Along with GH, they've been testing a number of other hormones.  Turns out my testosterone levels are really high.  According to my doctor, if I were 18, they'd be a little high, but at 40, it qualifies as really damn high.

"Do I look like someone with high testosterone?" I asked.  I don't.  I don't even need to shave.  My doctor is Indian, and so that may account for her odd choice of words, but she asked if I "feel manly."  I was just confused.  What the hell does that mean?

She explained that, given my phenotypical appearance, it was especially unusual, and suggested resistance.  I didn't even know this was a thing.  My body may be trying to compensate for the sort of resistance that can cause men to feel like they're women?  

Honestly, I've never understood that.  I was raised to eschew gender stereotypes, I don't associate feelings with manliness or femininity.. but also, no, I've never had any doubts about my gender identity.  I'm not the most manly of men, but yeah.  No.

What the hell, though.  On top of everything else, weak receptors can be issue?  I'd say no wonder I'm such a mess, but isn't this always the case.  Whatever our condition, we can be sure there are reasons for it.

Plus, there's this study correlating spicy food with testosterone levels, so I can't be all that resistant.

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