Tuesday, June 13, 2017

peer review

I do seem to be a bit of a weirdo.  That is, unusual in my interests, my way of thinking, my entire lifestyle.  My sense of alienation could simply be that I find it difficult to find any points upon which to relate to people.  How does this happen though?  People's interests are usually shaped by their social interactions, right?  

Why did I choose to instead form my identity from abstract bits and pieces of the broader observable world?  Everyone I knew had lousy taste.  In everything.

No, that's unnecessary.  People like what they like.  Who am I to judge.  My tastes do seem to be a bit obscure though.  At times, I go the other way, questioning the sanity of it.  That is, what the hell am I always doing by myself, way out in left field?  Maybe I'm the one who doesn't know what's going on?  Sometimes I wonder if I might just be malfunctioning in some way.

This doesn't seem to be working out well for me, but, is this the result of my anxiety, or is it the cause?  Being in a world that makes me feel like some kind of crazy person does make me anxious - isn't that entirely rational?  

I'm a little skeptical of the notion that I'd have different results anywhere else, but if there's a sane country out there somewhere that will take me, who knows.

I bet North Koreans think the whole world is insane, too.  I wonder if school lunches there are as bad as mine were.

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