impetus

Sometimes I wonder if you've noticed that I have nothing.  That I came here, with nothing.  No friends, hardly any belongings.  I had a cat, but he died.  No plans, no hobbies, no interests.

That is pretty strange, right?

People don't seem to quite notice.  They do, in a peripheral sort of way.  They notice that I mope around a lot.  They notice that there are things I should do, that I'm not doing.. but they don't seem to notice that this is because, in a broader inexplicable sense, I don't do things.

Of course, that's not 100% true.  I do this.  I rant about current events.  I even play my guitar a little.  I have no idea how to play a guitar, but I take regular stabs at it, anyhow.  It is one of the few things I do, and, well.. I don't, really.

This sucks.

Oh, and my doctors won't call me back, they won't tell me what's going on.  I don't have a good feeling about this.  I was so close, but it looks like insurance might not be insuring me.