Turns out, I am going to Hawaii, after all. As I told my father, if I feel capable of it, I'll try to get there. Well, some aspects of life have been much better lately, and I am feeling like maybe I can undertake something like being quarantined for a month so that I can spend twenty hours on an airplane during a pandemic to see my father for the last time. I can't wait.
I wanted to be a positive influence and really tried for a while, but then covid happened and he went flying off to Hawaii in the middle of it. Fuck. I just have to accept it, deal with it as it is. I'm leaving mid September. Figured I'd try reading The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying again in the meantime. It's been a few decades, and I don't think I'm doing this right.
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