second wave

I have these vague memories of being around people. Community college. Was I trying to go to school, or did I dream that? I don't remember what I was doing exactly, but it felt like I was doing something. I wonder what it would be like to feel that way in real life.

There were martial arts classes too. I used to struggle to go, sometimes my mind or body just wasn't up for it. Sometimes I had to take months off, healing from an injury while focusing on school. but sometimes I'd actually get there.

I have so many nice memories of almost feeling like an actual human being for a while there. It's been a huge improvement for me, such as it was. It was my entire life. Those two things.

Now they don't even seem real. Was that me, doing all that? It all feels increasingly distant and unlikely. I used to bike all over, but I've had nowhere to go for months. I think it's still summer outside.